I am a man aged 26, married with one baby girl. I have been married for two years now and last month I bumped into my ex-girlfriend in South Africa and we started seeing each other. She doesn’t know I am married and she did not make the situation easy for me to tell her. We never broke up three years ago, we just lost touch after she came here (South Africa) for her studies and her family was totally against me dating her saying I was too low a class for her. I am afraid we will make this into a serious sexual relationship soon and things could turn ugly. I don’t know how to tell her that I am married. Please help me with ideas. – Ken
Dear Ken
You should have told her that you got married the first day you met. You say that she did not make the situation easy for you to tell her, but why could you not take the initiative and make the situation easy for yourself. You are also to blame for the situation and you don’t want things to turn uglier than it is already. There is no easy way to do this. You just need to do it and do it quickly.
So I advise you to sit down with her and explain what happened after she left as soon as possible. And then you need to end the relationship – for the sake of your wife and daughter. It is unfair to your ex-girlfriend to continue the relationship without her knowing you are now a family man. She is probably fantasising about the possibility of getting married – yet you are married already. That is so unfair to her.
It is totally different on your part – you are actually cheating on your wife knowingly, jeopardising the future of your marriage and the security and happiness of your child. Imagine how you would feel if you wife was the one keeping such a secret? – Aunty Lisa
Post published in: Lifestyle