Peep and speak less

miss_legs_international.jpegThere are plenty of pageants around this season. Miss Legs in Zanu (PF) was finally won by none other than Joy, whilst the close contester, Oppah was snoring on duty.

After all the assurances from the Mnagwagwa camp that she had all the flesh needed to turn and twist heads, she now plans a re-run at the Party Congress. They need to inform her that the party congress is postponed indefinitely, at least until funds are available. Fear is that Jona, the Miss-Informer-in-chief wasnt as dynamic at the show as Oppah expected. Jona is vicious when he attacks, like he is powered by Duracell batteries. He recently borrowed boots, thus he is now back in the game, and we are going to experience the ferocity of his mischievously trained tongue.

The Ancient dinosaur stands erect with no prompt at all. The gold medal in Zanu (PF) leadership went uncontested to the Ancient Dinosaur. The Silver medal went to none other than the man who escaped charges of having abused a fellow man. Seems after the man from Canana, eater of bananas, the office of VP is soon to be occupied by another man-for-man-as-woman. Forget that, remember the silver medal went to the man with little creases on his bumz, Johnie? The only concern is who is sleeping with this humble comrade?

The bronze is yet to be claimed, so the pageant is still on. Takers are still invited from party faithfools. The third runner up, apart from winning the bronze medal, will occupy the office left vacant by humble Johnie, as party chairman.

We have losers and most are astonished; why in this party of political harlotry did they fail to be forwarded as either VP or party chairman [man only]. In political language, astonished is a very strong word that should be avoided. The Ancient Dinosaur can be astonished at your astonishment. But as a party loyalist, you must not be astonished at his astonishment at your astonishment. Not only must you avoid being astonished, but you must also avoid being astonished.

Now with the MDC making impressive in roads in the inclusive government, Zanu (PF) wishes to change the name to one that is more attractive. The politburo is considering seriously adopting the name Movement for Dictatorial Continuity PF, leader being the Ancient Dinosaur.

The Prime Minister is soon to manage a potentially embarrassing situation; he has to defend one of his men who is slipping adroitly between the sheets of an unholy matrimony. At least I am sleeping in bed-sheets in which I am authorized to sleep.

All the men would impress on the voting community, but who is sleeping in authorized sheets? Or does someone have to go undercover? Some have more than four bed-sheets to sleep under, of course in different houses, with different women. The Prime Ministers spokesman would definitely comment on this. Peep less and Speak less.

Post published in: Opinions

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