Who is the boss?

Dear Aunty Lisa

I have recently been promoted and most of the team who have been my close friends are all my subordinates and now are supposed to report to me. We have been close for a long time and we have been going out together and drinking beer over the weekends. I still respect them as friends but my problem now is that they no longer know where to draw the line, I am now their boss and I want that difference to be clear.

It is affecting our working relationship as they keep giving me silly excuses and they expect me to understand simply because I have been one of them and shared the same problems. I want them to respect me and I want to have that authoritative voice. How can I do that? – Boss Leo

Dear Boss Leo

Being a leader takes a number of qualities and being able to control your team is important if you are to be successful in achieving your goals. But this does not mean you stand up and say, “Right guys I am now your boss and don’t expect any favours because I am no longer one of you.” Respect has to be earned – your actions need to prove it.

This will take time and you need to be patient and wise about it. You are in your own league now. Drinking beer with them or hanging out with them is now a serious “don’t”. But you cannot cut the relationship just like that. You need to slowly make yourself unavailable to them, pretend to be busy if you have to and make them see that it is no longer possible to make you one of their own.

When making decisions and talking to them, make it clear that you are not affected by the fact that you were at one time friends. Be ready to be hated or for things to be said behind your back. If you don't do a character turn around now and assume the position of your friend’s boss they will keep treating you as one of them and always think they can get away with any silly excuse for not perfuming their duties.

Once that begins to happen it will affect the whole company and you will look like a bad manager in the eyes of your employers. So, right now you need to choose between your career and your friends. Once you chose a career and the new position you now have then you have to sacrifice friendship with your subordinates. Wish you all the best. – Aunty Lisa

Post published in: Lifestyle

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