Problem child

I am a primary school teacher with just two years’ experience. I have had a problem with one parent who came to me fuming asking why I had spanked her daughter. She is the only one that I have done that to as a way of punishment and it does not even qualify as abuse. But she has made it clear to me that I shall not lay my hand on her child. I am not sure how to handle the issue as her child is so naughty. Ironically other parents have actually encouraged me to discipline their children that way. How do I handle this? – Madam Chikuwira

Dear Madam Chikuwira

If a parent does not want her child spanked or punished you need to comply with their wishes. But I would suggest you need to sit down with the parent and explain the consequences of treating her child differently from the others in your class. You need to explain that this could encourage the child to be disruptive and disobedient – knowing that the teacher won’t do anything to her.

You need to understand that some parents have had a bad experience of their children being abused and they end up failing to distinguish between abuse and any light punishment. So before giving up on the child, whose future is of great importance here, get her parent fully understand the consequences of any action. Some parents will be coming from an uninformed background. Perhaps you could discuss alternative punishment with the parent so that you agree beforehand how any misbehavior is to be dealt with. This could include denying the child participation in an activity she particularly enjoys – or spending some time on the “naughty step”. You should also consult more experienced teachers – I am sure they could advise you. – Aunty Lisa