Dear Franco
You are really old enough to get married yes, but your friends should not decide when you are ready. You have no hurry to get married if you feel you are not yet ready. You need to prepare yourself well to start a family and know how you are going to take care of them. It can only be you and not your friends who will know that.
You say you are currently making a living out of dealing you know what that is but to many it means you basically dont have a strong educational background to back you up when it does not work out well with your deals one day. This is why your parents are so concerned. They may appreciate the money you are making out of what you are doing but they are right to feel that you need professional qualifications you can rely on for a stable job one day.
You can do your job and continue with your education as well, it will be your best treasure in future. But we are all not brilliant enough to acquire the desired education our parents wish for us and we can still find our way of surviving and earning a living through using our God-given talents. This has seen many self-employed individuals making a fortune by using their talents.
A lot have found their way in the sporting fraternity and earned a living out of it despite their poor educational background. Others have stamped authority in the small to medium enterprises and they have earned a living out of it.
It may not be too bad for you after all as long as what you are doing is legal and will survive to see you through life. I wish you the best. – Gracey
Hes too shy
Dear Gracey
I am a single mother aged 30 and I work as a security guard. There is a man working at a company I guard who loves me, it seems he is too shy to approach me and he sent his friend who told me all about it. I later sent him a text message telling him that I feel the same for him. I dont know if I did the wrong thing? He is currently out of town with work but he has not replied me yet, does it mean that he no longer loves me? Why do you think he is not responding?
Do you think he is now listening to his friends who were laughing and discouraging him of dating a security guard? I just dont know now, please advice. – Hanging
Dear Hanging
First you need to know that everyone deserves to be loved and this amazing feeling called love knows no race, profession or age. You did not do anything wrong in sending him that text message because it is certainly no crime that you love him too.
My only worry is his silence now, but assuming that he has changed his mind will be wrong until you sit down and talk. He may have his good reasons for the silence. I just hope he has not been made to turn his back on love because of your status in society. If his status at work matters so much to him, he is bound to consider too much what his friends are saying, which is stupid.
But what you need to do is stop worrying and wait until he is back. You can ask him if he got your message and request that you talk. He will need to make it clear to you how he feels, there is no need for him to hesitate because he is aware that you are not going to turn down his proposal. What you want to try and avoid is a situation where he will deny ever loving you and accuse you of stalking him in the end, when all the time you both were going out in the name of love.
If he denies ever saying that he loves you then you just need to let him go, he will not run away from his feelings for too long and love will come to you. – Gracey
Pregnant and dumped
Dear Gracey
I am a 22-year-old girl. I recently found out that Im pregnant and last week my 26-year-old boyfriend dumped me when I told him about it. He has made it clear that he does not want anything to do with the pregnancy because he is still looking for a job and will not be able to take care of the baby. He is insisting I have an abortion and Im getting so stressed and it appears the only way out. I know it may not be the best decision but what can I do when Im all alone in this? Obviously my parents will not accept this and I dont want to give them the burden of raising my daughter as well after the sacrifices they went through to get me in college. – Miss Dee
Dear Miss Dee
I understand how stressful it is to get the man you love and trusted dumping you because you are caring his child. But I want you to look at the brighter side of things each time you feel let down.
Having an abortion and destroying that baby is not the perfect solution to your situation. A baby is a special gift from God no matter what circumstances the mother gets pregnant in, be it after being raped or by a man who later dumps her to be a single mother.
With your situation I understand how this pregnancy may be a reminder of how your man left you and the problems you think you are going to face alone. But trust me, if you learn to love your unborn child now you will see how special this is to you.
Your parents will obviously be disappointed because all parents wish the best for their daughters. What they consider the best for you at that age if getting a job, work for at least two years as you buy them all sorts of gifts and make them proud. They want to be able to proudly say This is my daughter who was studying for a degree in accounting now she is working for a big company in town! – you know how it is.
Though I dont know your parents that much, I know any parent wish for that in their daughters knowing that there will be a possibility of her getting impregnated along the way. It was going to shock them if you were 17 and still in school, but at your age, they know how to accept and handle it. They are your only source of comfort at the moment so dont run away or hide the truth from them.
Abortion is not always safe and it is not something I would ever encourage anyone. Some people I know who had abortions early in their lives are struggling to have a baby after being happily married now and it is something they are regretting.
Your boyfriend may have dumped you and said a lot of painful things but he may have been hit by the news he least expected. I can promise you that he will later come to his senses and realize how much of a blessing this baby is. He may not come back to ask for your hand in marriage or admit that he was wrong but I have seen some men regretting making their girlfriends go through an abortion later in life.
Keep your baby knowing that you are doing the right thing and I can promise you that one day you will be proud of yourself for making that decision. Stay blessed and know that God will take care of you if you let him. – Gracey
Post published in: Uncategorized