Drowning in eulogies

February and March will see the release of O and A Level examination results and more disgruntled youths will joins the growing millions of the unemployed. Round about that time, President Mugabe will emerge from his palatial cocoon to throw another extravagant birthday bash. For lack of solutions to the deepening economic crisis, the state media and all parastatals will do their level best to extend the President’s birthday – drowning us in Mugabe eulogies, months past the event.

As the year wears on, new distractions will be created to grab the attention of the beleaguered populace. Last year the diversion came in the form of the so-called corruption exposés by Zimpapers. For most of 2014, the ruling party was preoccupied with its farcical elective congress. There is no congress in 2015 so those whose job it is to keep us entertained will be hard-pressed to find a new divertissement.

Forever the poor workman who blames his tools, Mugabe will most likely tinker with his cabinet. Already, several ministers have been sacked – all of them believed to be in cohorts with alleged take-over plotter, Joice Mujuru. After patching together a cabinet – probably with one eye on his year-end leave – Mugabe rather curiously left the post of Minister of Women’s Affairs vacant, leading to speculation that Grace is earmarked to take over from Oppah Muchinguri.

Muchinguri
Muchinguri

In the event of a reshuffle, the sensible thing would be to shrink the cabinet in line with cost-cutting measures recommended by the finance ministry.

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