Zim drivers are colour blind-(08-02-07

If you come and visit us here in Zimbabwe, don't for one minute think that the rules of the road apply to anyone at all... Except possibly yourself.
The Zimbabwean public has a colour problem ....red, green and orange all mean "go" it would appear. We call our traffic lights robots, yes, like tho

se mechanical things that walk around with stiff legs. It causes much mirth with visitors, but they lose their sense of humour when they see most people take absolutely no notice of reds and oranges.
Now, be cautioned and take my advice, do not think that green means your right of passage, treat every robot as a stop street and proceed with caution.
During power cuts, do not under any circumstance think that we treat our non- functioning traffic lights as a four way stop (as they do in the rest of the civilised world)
Oh no sirree, if the robot is not working, the law of the jungle that takes over. The biggest, fiercest, oldest beast in the jungle wins – and it’s the fastest car to the middle.
Another bit of advice….be like everyone else in Zimbabwe and totally ignore the pedestrian crossings. If you do the courteous thing and stop for a pedestrian…the fellow in the next lane will take no notice and wipe out the poor unsuspecting pedus.
The zebra stripes are illegible at any rate, they are usually on a bend or on the brow of a hill, with no warning signs or lights, and the paint is so faint you are highly unlikely to be able to see them.
Also you waste a lot of time trying to gently shoo a pedestrian to cross in front of you, ‘cos believe me, he ain’t gonna trust you. No ways will he believe that you are not going to put your foot flat the moment he steps on that first white line.
Vehicle road-worthiness is another interesting aspect of Zimbabwean driving. Who on earth would expect one to have either headlights or tail lights…don’t be silly, lights are for sissies.
Make sure you peer hard into the dark and suss the road out carefully before crossing, as those cars without lights always come out at night, as there are no police at night to catch them of course.
Mind you, it would appear that the police and the city council are doing their best these days to elevate us from the status of being the wild west of southern Africa thank goodness. Much muttering is being heard from errant citizens who have had their cars clamped in no parking areas.
The Mayoress of Duncan Road and the musical Mayor of Townsend Road were both seen recently trotting down to the revenue hall, to pay fines and release their automobiles.

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