Our lives had become unmanageable and an embarrassment – such that, we actually felt inadequate and unsuitable as spouses and parents, since we perennially failed to play our role in satisfactorily taking care of our families, on account of our ill-advised behavior and inappropriate thinking.
In order to make up for this indepth sense of failure and inadequacy, we made every effort in over-compensating by increasingly attempting to convince our spouses and children that we were doing everything in our powers to improve ourselves, and our family’s welfare and wellbeing.
However, what I learnt from personal experience is that, whenever an individual is found trapped in such a mindset of trying too much, or going overboard, in convincing those around him of his “reformed nature” – thereby pronouncing, and even celebrating every little measure he was taking to apparently improve the family’s livelihood, no matter how negligible and mediocre – usually, very little comes out of these assurances.
During my own time, when I had lost direction in life (due to my wrong decisions) I would ensure that my family was made aware of every employment application letter I sent, who had responded, and made sure that even something like being invited for an interview, was a cause for celebration and jubilations – as if the job had already been secured.
All this would be meant to instil some hope and optimism in those I had failed – in the hope that they would stop regarding me as a loser.
This was certainly a most sad time in my life, and that of my family – as all these attempts at convincing them that “everything was now getting better”, revealed a downtrodden and battered soul, who had become a shameful shell of his former self, and clutching at anything (no matter how small) for some semblance of redemption for my failures.
What I learnt from that tragic experience is that – one who feels the need to go overboard in convincing his family to celebrate even the most negligible and flimsy things he would have done, is usually not going anywhere in life – since it could all be just a facade of change, in order to foister a false sense of hope in those around him.
I am always reminded of that sorrowful period, which I try my best to put behind me and forget – but can not, as I witness a similar trend, on a daily basis, being adopted by the Zimbabwe regime.
Whenever I hear the Zimbabwe government going all out in informing the nation of the supposedly large numbers of visitors flocking to the country’s exhibition pavilion at the ongoing Dubai Expo 2020, or the many people who have made inquiries, and “explored” new investment opportunities – I am always reminded of those days, when I would even excitedly inform my wife of “influential people” or “those in high positions” I had met, who could possibly offer me employment, as I flaunted their business cards as “proof” of these encounters…in as much as nothing concrete in that regard had been settled.
Whenever I see on local television a whole cabinet minister jubilantly announcing plans to procure some ambulances they saw at the same fair in Dubai – as if this was a done deal, and the ambulances would soon be on a ship destined for Zimbabwe – I am reminded of when I would jump up and down as I showed my wife a job advert that I felt suited me “perfectly”, and was well qualified for…as if the job had actually being offered to me, and would start any day.
We have witnessed this most disturbing trend in our country with maddening regularity – as we are told how several foreign investors had “expressed interest” in establishing their business ventures in the country, or the government having signed a couple of “memorandums of understanding” with this or that country, or how plans were in the “pipeline” or at an “advanced level” to reopen particular companies.
Why celebrate the reaping of fruits that have not even flowered yet?
What my own personal experiences taught me the hard way is that, when one has finally truly turned his life around, and is making real significant efforts in changing the fortunes of his family – he does not see the need to megaphone and celebrate “buds”, but patiently waits until the fruits are well and truly ripe and ready for picking.
Simply because, one who is confident in his plans bearing fruit, does not see the need to announce them, especially when they are still exactly that…mere plans!
He who finds it necessary to blabber on and on, even celebrating his plans to sow seeds – is nothing more than a dreamer, who can never, and should never, be taken seriously, since his motives are largely driven by a weighing down by his own failures.
Zimbabwe is in this boat – whereby, the population is inundated with endless promises of “what could be”, instead of “what has been” achieved – due to a ruling elite that is submerged in the knowledge that they have lost all respectability, credibility and dignity in the eyes of the citizenry, whose livelihoods they have wantonly destroyed and ruined.
Such tendencies are merely the acts of a government that has zero prospects of ever achieving any of their dreams – but, merely desire to placate a restless population.
We are being taken for a ride by those in the country’s ruling elite.
© Tendai Ruben Mbofana is a social justice activist, writer, and social commentator. Please feel free to contact him on WhatsApp/Call: +263715667700 / +263782283975, or Calls Only: +263788897936 / +263733399640, or email: [email protected]Post published in: Featured