Cheating husband

I am a young woman who has been married for two years now. I have recently discovered that my husband is cheating, he is seeing more than one girlfriend and I am worried. I told his mother about it and she has advised me to hang in there and defend my marriage. He seems to blame me for going outside our home looking for other women. But the bottom line is he tells me that most people his age would not have grown old with their partners had it not been for perseverance. Is he right? – Sheila

Dear Sheila

Your husband is right to say most people your age would not have grown old together had it not been for the women’s perseverance and will power to make their marriages work. But that does not in any way excuse his behaviour. Eventually men come a point when they “grow up” and realise they will not achieve anything by chasing every beautiful women in town. So, it makes women appear the heroes of the marriage in waiting and believing in the union when men are testing the waters elsewhere. It is great that women where created in a nurturing and loving way. They continue to stand nurturing a relationship threatened from inside. This is good, as they win in the end.

But that strategy in this day and age is not wise. There are life-threatening sexually transmitted diseases that innocent women may contract due to the activities of an unfaithful husband. It is unfair of your husband to be placing you in a love network with other women.

It is important that you take action. You need to talk to your husband. Let him know that you are aware of what he is doing and that he needs to stop seeing these women immediately. Let him see the other side of the picture, how he risks losing his family for them. You need to be prepared to leave him and move on without him if he continues with this behaviour. I am not encouraging divorce here, it has its negative impact especially on the kids. But you need to put your health first .

Sit your husband down and reach out to his heart, connect with him and create a platform where you both go to the bottom of the problem. Once he stops cheating you both need to know the symptoms, the causes of him cheating and make efforts to rectify them. – Aunty Lisa